Irvine's Best Matchmakers | Why You Can't Keep a Boyfriend

By Orange County Singles Dating Service
Home / Dating Advice / Irvine’s Best Matchmakers | Why You Can’t Keep a Boyfriend

When you date a lot, then finally find yourself in a new relationship, only to be quickly be all alone again, you might begin to why you can’t meet the right guy. You probably even tell yourself that all the good ones are already taken. But have you ever pondered whether it was really the men you were dating, or if it was actually you that had the problem? As Irvine’s best matchmakers, we encourage you to do a little self-reflecting to see where the problem lies. Maybe you have a few things you need to work on before you can actually have a serious relationship.

Sometimes women get so overjoyed by landing a new boyfriend that they don’t realize they’re sabotaging their new relationship. Everyone makes mistakes in life, but you eventually need to figure out what dating mistakes you’re making so you can stop pushing men away.

If you find yourself jumping from relationship to relationship, it’s a good idea to figure out what you’re doing that is making men run in the opposite direction. To help you do that, Irvine’s best matchmakers will show you what you’re doing that is preventing you from keeping a relationship intact.

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1. You’re Too Clingy

This is perhaps the number one reason why you can’t keep a boyfriend. We are not saying that men don’t like to feel appreciated, loved, and showered with attention, but they can’t stand it 24 hours a day, and this isn’t just referring to being affectionate. When you text him all day long or want to know his whereabouts every second of the day, he is going to get fed up and not want to date you anymore.

You are not his parole officer who needs to know what he is doing every second of the day. Your boyfriend needs to have freedom to do the things that make him happy without you bugging him about his whereabouts. If you act this way and can’t trust your boyfriend, you shouldn’t be in a relationship. Learn to trust the person you’re with, and if you still can’t, work on your trust issues on your own. If you can’t combat your trust and insecurities issues, you’re going to keep pushing boyfriends away.

2. You Keep Talking About Past Relationships

Of course, at one point or another, it’s inevitable that you’ll talk about your exes and certain life experiences, but if that’s what you’re doing all the time, no man in the world is going to want to stay with you. If your new boyfriend thinks you’re still hung up on your ex, he will never believe things will work out with you and him because your heart is already invested in someone else.

If you keep talking about an ex, your new man could think you’re comparing him to your ex-boyfriend. Either way, it’s not good. Imagine how you would feel if your new man was always talking about his ex-girlfriend. You wouldn’t be able to put up with it, right? So why do you keep talking about your ex with him?

3. You’re Not Fully Honest with Him

Raise your hand if you ever lied about liking certain things just to impress a man. Don’t worry, because every woman out there has done it. Every woman can relate to this because they’ve done it at one point or another. A little white lie might be okay as long as it doesn’t affect the relationship or his views about you. But if you’re lying about major things, like your likes and dislikes, your values and beliefs, and your goals and expectations, to impress him, the truth will eventually come out and send your relationship crashing down.

The problem with major lies is that you can’t keep up with them forever. Sooner or later he’s going to notice that you were lying from the start, which will cause him to believe the relationship was built on lies. Or worse, he’ll think you lie about everything, which means he won’t be able to trust you. Both of these things will land you right back to being single again.

4. You’re Not Realistic About Relationships

How many romantic movies have you watched in the past few months? It’s a safe bet that you watched a lot of them, right? And that’s okay, as long as you don’t expect your romantic life to play out like the movies. If you are someone who wants a love story like the ones in the movies, then you’re in for a rude awakening because no man will ever be like the Romeos in the movies.

As Irvine’s best matchmakers, we know firsthand what happens when people have too high of expectations in dating. They end up pushing their partner away when they can’t fulfill those unrealistic expectations. If you are not realistic with your relationship expectations, you’re going to find yourself single more than you wish. You could be dating your soul mate and push him away simply because he doesn’t act like men in the movies you watch.

5. You’re Not Doing Your Part

A relationship is like a two-way street. In fact, if you want your relationship to work, you both have to put in 110% efforts, so we guess it goes beyond a two-way street. If you really want to make it work, you must put in a lot of energy and efforts. If you’re someone with the mindset that a man is supposed to put in all the work, such as taking care of dates, spoiling you, and surprising you, then you’re not doing what you’re supposed to do in a relationship.

You have to put in the same efforts to make it work. If you just landed yourself a man and think, “Great, my job is done,” then you’re going to find yourself single anytime soon. You should never stop making your man feel special, even after you landed a relationship. If you stop putting in efforts, then you can’t be surprised by why your relationships never last.

So tell us, how many of these do you see in yourself? If you find yourself asking “Why can’t I keep a boyfriend?” now you have your answer. As Irvine’s best matchmakers, we want you to work on your bad dating habits so you can be equipped and ready to maintain a happy relationship. When that day comes, we’ll be here to help you find it.

As Irvine’s best matchmakers, we work with relationship-minded men who are looking for a woman like yourself. If you want to meet them, fill out the quick and easy survey at the top of the page to reserve your FREE (90 minute) matchmaking consultation with Irvine’s best matchmakers today. Let our Orange County dating and relationship coaches give you the guidance and support you need to find and keep love in your love!

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